I hate starting my day like that. I'm a hugs and kisses mom. But today, the littlest one was whining at the au pair (he's in the "Stop! I can do it." mode for EVERYTHING). And the oldest one:
- Couldn't find his jacket. Swore he wore it home. After much cajoling, realized he took it off at recess and left it on the playground - 2 days ago. This is about the 20th jacket I've purchased for him in the three years we've lived here. I told him he owes me $20 to go buy a new one.
- Couldn't find his shoes and asked me where they were. By the time I got home from work last night, he was the shoeless wonder. And he has a habit of taking them off in completely random places all over the house (its a big house). But he still thinks my magic mom radar can locate them.
- Couldn't find his library book. I reminded him he laid it down in the dining room. He fought with me and told me he didn't. I found it in the dining room.
- Walked away from me when I asked him to come. Swears it was just to look for his stuff, but he's starting to get defiant.
And this morning was a continuation of last night where he was razzing his little brother unmercifully, and caused him to hang up on the good Dr., who was calling in for his nightly call. I mean, the man is calling from halfway around the world and this kid doesn't have the sense to know that the last thing he wants to do is listing to Son #1 making Son #2 cry.
I lost it. I told him his lack of responsibility was really starting to make me angry and that if he didn't improve his "first response" time when I asked him to do something, there would be consequences.
All of which made me cranky, late to the office, and feeling like a mean mom.
So there you have it - comment only if you have sympathy or advice - I already know I was a bitch.
Respectfully submitted,
The Wife
6 comments:
As the wise Bernie Mac once said..."You gotta beat 'em till the white meat shows."
Two words...
"Tough Love"
No one is going to dress him or help him when he is in the real world. Step it up and bring it.
My dad always used to make me understand there were consequences for all of my actions.
Today when Shelby messes up, I ask her to get out a pad and a pencil and prepare to start writing.
After 50 times of writing "I won't yell at my dad" she is pretty calm.
If she starts up again. "Do I need to number 10 more times Shelby?"
'uh no.'
"good"
If you aren't tough with them now, you'll lose control.
Smile
You are not a mean mom, you love your kids more than anything in the world.
sd / IT
You're a better woman than I am. I would have thrown both of them out in the snow (son # 1 without the jacket and shoes that he wasn't able to find) then sick'ed the dogs on them.
I will not be calling you a bitch. I know how crazy it can get sometimes, and I'm sure with me away, it only makes it worse. I wanted to reach through the phone (before they hung up on me) to tell them to stop fighting. I spoke about it with the older one when I talked to him today, and I think he got it. I hope so.
I'm not sure who has it tougher - You trying to be a sole parent or me trying to parent from 8,000 miles away. For what it's worth, I think you win this one.
Blogs are an interesting forum. They are kind of like resumes in that they often paint a rosy picture because it what you want the world to think. This post was a nice look into the other side.
-The Husband
Dear "The Wife,"
I was extraordinarily lucky when I raised my three kids, which, as you know, included Dr. Chako. The good fortune to which I refer was the fact that our house had a root cellar. It was dark and dank, and home to a myriad of rather large, weird-looking spiders. Consequently, when any of the children misbehaved...
Hunter Silvastorm
www.huntersilvastorm.com
The Doc's right...
Life isn't always cheery!
Keep smiling
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