Saturday, January 16, 2010


I find horoscopes and astrology a curious amusement. Like much religion and other mystical stuff, there is enough stuff in it that sounds believable at times you think "hmmm . . . I could believe that". But then once in a while you hit something really wacky, much like in religion (tie strings to your garments . . . don't eat shellfish . . . eat this cracker and pretend it some dead guys body . . . ), and you go "huh?"

I'm a Scorpio. I find that descriptions of Scorpio women are eerily accurate with respect to me. Even the crazy lady who really says a Scorpio woman's deepest regret is we weren't born a man. Except for that little blurb, she was pretty spot on. I think even my hubby would probably agree - she did say I'd make a good spouse for an Army man.

An excerpt from another one? "The sexuality, the secrets, the magnetism; it all sounds like so much to deal with! So why bother? It's worth dealing with a Scorpio beauty because of her great capacity for kindness. This may sound strange, but Scorpios, despite their tendency for walking on the wild side of life, truly want to do good in the world. In fact, a Scorpio woman may actually be the nicest, kindest, most good-natured person you've ever met; she connects that well with those who are suffering or are in pain. The other reason is one you've probably already guessed. Despite the drama, once a Scorpio woman loves you she'll love you for life. If she really believes in you, she will look past your flaws (but she will comment on them!) and risk life and limb to keep you safe from harm. If it's a passionate, long-lasting commitment you are after, look no further than a Scorpio beauty."

Then again, my friend Sheila, in high school, was born 5 days earlier than me and was NOTHING like that. Go figure.

So I have this funny thing with horoscopes. I like to read them. Sometimes, I like to write them. But I'm a big believer in the self-fulfilling prophecy, and like I feel about when religious fanatics believe prophecies are fulfilled, I think you tend to see what you want. So if you read your horoscope before the day starts, and you want to believe them, OF COURSE you will subconsciously alter your behavior or interpret everything to match the horoscope.

So I read mine in arrears - after the fact, to see how accurate they can be. Some days they are very general and could be interpreted any way you want. Some days, there is a little "hmmm . . . interesting how that correlates." I have had times, though, when I read them, and was significantly disturbed by how accurately they aligned with the previous day's events already in the history books. As if someone had been scripting my life. Particularly when the events of the day held some kind of heavy significance. At times, its eerie enough that I make myself stop reading for a few days, because I hate the thought that something besides me is controlling the outcomes.

Today was a monumentally good day. I slept late. Really late. Past lunch late. Got up and chatted with my aunt. Showered. Talked decorating, and walked through her house, planning the finishing touches on this expansive space that she's now left to make a home by herself. Ate a long, lazy late lunch/early dinner. Talked endlessly, mostly about relationships. Shed a few tears for my uncle who had passed - she still grieves and is trying to find her way without him.

We went shopping. Looked for area rugs. Tried on girly shoes and skirts and sweaters. Bought girly shoes and skirts and sweaters. Came home and talked for hours. Paused to tell my hubby and kids that I loved them. Ended the night sharing fond remembrances of when Brett Favre played for our team. Grudgingly admitted we'll be cheering for the Vikings, now that our team was out. Went online to review all the football records Favre holds. Determined that his next closest competitors in those long-haul career records were Fran Tarkington, Dan Marino, and John Elway, and realized we'd be able to rest easy for a good portion of our lifetime knowing our guy was pretty safe. Agreed that Peyton Manning currently has the best chance of potentially catching up to any of them.

It was such a perfect day, I couldn't help reading my horoscope, to see how good the stars were at seeing this kind of perfection coming. This is what I got:

You are annoyed at someone who doesn't respect your boundaries today and it may be necessary to take a stand. For example, a roommate or neighbor might be overly noisy and inconsiderate of your needs. Even if you decide to take an adaptable approach and patiently anticipate a quieter time, your irritation could build to antagonism. Don't wait until it's too late; it's best to express your feelings now before you lose your temper.

Is it just me, or is astrology just crap sometimes?

Respectfully submitted,

The Wife

1 comment:

Sean D said...

Astrology is only good when you BELIEVE in it.

It's total crap.

Because if it wasn't I was supposed to be lucky Saturday.

And that happened then was getting sick.

Astrology can bite it!