Poker? Yeah, I'd Like to Poke Her . . . I Mean Him . . . ???

The internet has created this bizarre, marvelous place. Where you can find anything or anyone, anytime or anywhere.

But it's created this dichotomy of trust/mistrust about the information you receive. Everything so readily available . . . yet in the back of your mind, you're always asking yourself "is this real?"

If you ever saw the movie "Closer" with Julia Roberts, Clive Owen, Natalie Portman and Jude Law, you'll understand. There is a scene where Clive Owen is having an instant message exchange with what he thinks is a woman. He's getting graphic. Really graphic. Like "face-sitting" graphic. The woman he's chatting with? It's actually Jude Law. Now I know you men are starting to squirm at that thought (keep in mind, I happened to go see this movie with my mother . . . ick). You're grossed out at the thought of two guys having this conversation. Either that or you're thinking about that instant message chat you jerked off to last week and are thinking maybe it wasn't a girl . . .

So last night I was playing a free money game on Poker Stars. My little icon is my picture (the one from my profile here). My name is Mrs Chako. And when I chat with people, I'm about as honest as they come.

Middle of the game, like most games, one of the other players puts in a comment:

cgarcia: MrsChako, you look hot.

I thank him, and he continues to make flirtatious overtures. Until another player pipes up.

Myosin: She's probably a dude.

This started a debate. Did I really look like that? Was I really a girl? How could I prove it? They started asking me questions. What size dress do you wear? 6 What cup size are you? (information withheld) What size shoe do you wear? 9 . . . of course this led to a "big feet" comment which further fueled the speculation that I was a man. And probably not even married, at that. I tried to tell them you need big feet to balance this tall drink of water . . .

The conversation continued, even to the point that the original flirter asked to exchange e-mails so we could exchange pictures (I did not). He joked that if I was a girl, I could send pictures of myself, and if I was a dude, I'd just send him pictures of hot women, so he was ok, either way. The original Doubting Thomas, tried to get in on the flirting action too, at this point.

I was amused, but not to be a winner. I got decimated with my J-10 of hearts, which had paired with the 10 on the board, and gave me an open ended straight draw and a flush draw on the turn, but didn't hold up to the pair of queens. And then I went all in with pocket 4s, which lost to 8-4 offsuit when the 8 hit the board. Out in 7th place.

I left the table open for a minute or two, and was rewarded with this exchange . . .

cgarcia: She's gone.
Myosin: She was a dude.

I guess you'll just have to come to one of the blogger tourneys to find out . . . Or ask BamBam or IT or someone else you trust for confirmation.

Respectfully submitted,

The Wife