The Bash - A Hint of Things to Come?

When Team "Al Can't Hang" shows up with uniforms, did the other team have any chance?

I finally understand what she means when she's talking about top two pair . . .

Although I would like to submit evidence that while Al's liver might be legendary, team Otis clearly brought their top talent to the Car Bomb relay . . . notice the instant replay on the head to head here . . . Nice showing Otis! Like you said, just open your throat . . .

Respectfully submitted,

The Wife

The Bash - Why Haven't We Gone Before?

Hmmm . . .

Tired. My stomach is a little touchy. My calves and thighs hurt. I think my left hand is a little sore from pumping. I can't get "Oh Canada" out of my head. And my lips are chapped.

And I seem to remember at least one person questioning my sexual preference. Or perhaps believing I had multiple preferences.

Hmmm . . .

Lets do that again!

Respectfully submitted,

The Wife

Remembering Yellowstone

"I swear to God, Mom . . . it was THIS BIG . . . "

Respectfully submitted,

The Wife

The Bash - My Cry For Help II

Ok, now I learn the poker game on Friday gets started at 8 p.m. Provided my flights are on time, I get in at 7:30 p.m. Does this mean I am precluded from playing? Am I going to totally have to rail this one? Can anyone take pity on the poor chick from the West Coast for whom flights totally suck? I'm on an 8 a.m. flight - can I help it that the 3 hour time change and United's connections aren't helpful?

Advice please. I'm going to let Al know - somewhere, there is a miracle. I think. And maybe, after a drunken round of golf, I shouldn't expect my husband to drive to come pick me up anyway.

Respectfully submitted,

The Wife

The Bash - My Cry For Help

So we're booked for the Bash. Separately, I might add.

See, some of us have real jobs. That pay well, but expect you to be at work a certain number of days for that pay. Others of us feel into some fairy poop, somewhere along the way, and are paid even better, and granted so much time off, that they have to randomly take every other Friday off to pick lint out of their navels, just to try to use up the paid vacation.

DrChako will be arriving Thursday evening, allowing him to join whatever golf activities are planned. You might want to contact him about that, because knowing my husband, he probably hasn't given any of you official notice and just expects to show up, clubs in hand.

Fortunately, I've booked him a car and a hotel. At least for the nights I'll be staying. Gotta get home Sunday evening and back to work. After that, he's on his own. He's staying a few days extra, planning to visit family. But he actually hasn't coordinated that AT ALL. Wish him luck.

So I will be flying in Friday evening, around 7:30 p.m. My hubby is not quite certain he'll be off the golf course at that time and wanted to know how I was getting to the Friday night festivities. So this is my plea . . .

If my husband can't come pick me up from the airport in Philly, do I have any of my blogging brethren who would be willing to give me a ride? I'll be carrying precious cargo - Drizz's Packer headgear - and who doesn't want to see him in that?

Whoever signs up to be my back up plan gets an extra special hug . . .

Respectfully submitted,

The Wife

White Wedding?

So the family and I decided to eat at one of our local favorite restaurants - Tokyo Japanese Steak House. It's a typical Japanese tepanyaki style where they cook in front of you. We eat there at least once a month, sometimes more. The chefs know us, the host knows us, and Minah, one of the waitresses, always has to come over and give the two little boys extra attention. Last night, she even brought Son #2 an extra bowl of mushrooms (he never feels like he has enough in his soup). So in addition to good food, it's a great place for us to go because we get treated pretty well.

We had a guest with us, who enjoyed the whole experience. So even though we know all the tricks, it was fun to watch her amazement at the various tricks Joon could throw together.

We thought the entertainment was over after Joon did his last fire throwing stint . . . until the giant party in white showed up.

About 14 women, all dressed in various white dresses or dressy pantsuits, with their highest heels, biggest hair, and most makeup they could muster. Including one Paris Hilton-esque chick who either had the best dye job or an outstanding platinum wig. I feared for a couple of the ladies - was certain we might have seen some tush, if they weren't careful about the lengths of the skirts.

We speculated about the attire and what it could all mean. I voted bachelorette party, given the "white" theme. Though I'm guessing that in this bunch, neither the bride, nor the bulk of her angelically dressed companions would technically be able to wear white to a wedding and have it mean anything close to virginal.

Dr. Chako's thoughts?

Terrorists.

You be the judge.

Respectfully submitted,

The Wife

(Not Quite) Under the Radar . . .

Busted.

Nice try on ordering from Overstock.com. If they've shipped your stuff, you're lucky . . . if not, we just hosed you. All $122.24. You could have aimed higher, at least. Or ordered from someplace your momma wouldn't want to see on the credit card bill.

Yeah, it will be a little inconvenient to be without the credit card for a few days until the new ones arrive. But I'm not paying for your shopping habit.

Too bad you picked the one family where we check the credit card statement on line . . . ALL THE TIME. And fortunately, DrChako is just one nosey guy who was hoping I'd bought him a gift. Can't fly under that radar.

Good luck with your credit card theft in the future . . . We'll be just fine. Annoyed. But just fine.

Respectfully submitted,

The Wife

Red Sky at Night . . .

From a few miles above Puget Sound . . . nice welcome home after a tiring business trip.

Respectfully submitted,

The Wife

Berries . . . berries . . . berries . . .

Respectfully submitted,

The Wife

Spiders

Respectfully submitted,

The Wife

The Boys (and Girls) of Summer . . .

Seattle gave us one more fantastic day. I'm heading to Spokane for business for the next few days, so this was my only down time this weekend.

A huge thanks to MHG for the invite. I'm not sure how some lovely young thing hasn't scooped this sweetheart up yet, but if I had a daughter of dating age, I'd let her date him in a heartbeat (I've avoided any mention of myself so as not to appear cougar-ish . . . he's below my threshold). Not only is he a nice guy, a great conversationalist, well-educated . . . he also rides a motorcycle and takes awesome pics. Go see.

All in all - great day. I'll let his write-up and some of my pics say the rest.

Respectfully submitted,

The Wife

Friday Randomness

I did a good thing today. Went with some folks from my firm and we cleared a local park of some blackberry brush that was overtaking the park. I look like I got in a fight with 17 really angry cats, and ache like hell. But there is satisfaction in manual labor.

Of course, the princess in me still got a manicure/pedicure and a massage when I was done.

*****

My son is going to be a ladykiller. Or get killed by a lady. Last night, we were discussing something at dinner, and after I had gushed on and on about the subject at hand, he turned to his father and whispered, under his breath, "Just look at her chin and pretend you're listening."

I hope they pay you for that kind of comedy one day, son, because at home, its just going to get you a night in the doghouse.

*****

I was the queen of domesticity tonight. Even battered and bruised, I made homemade chocolate chip cookies. Mmmmm . . .

Will share with this young man, who was kind enough to offer to show the Chako family some great nature escapes tomorrow . . . pictures to follow.

*****

I love romances . . . especially watching from the sidelines with my friends. All the excitement without the actual personal angst. Today's twist in the latest romance story was an e-mail with the following exclamation of desperation . . .

"The man has driven me to accessorizing!"

When asked if the next step was buying matching bras and panties, she appropriately responded in the negative, and I quote . . . .

". . . they wouldn't be on long enough to matter . . . "

WOOT!!! You go, sweetheart . . . live it!

*****

Other randomness . . . thanks Nana Judy!

Respectfully submitted,

The Wife

Ummm . . . Fail. Yes. Fail.

Today, our new au pair had to take her driver's test. She has an international license, but has to get a Washington license. She's really a good driver, and I watched her parallel park the minivan . . . she did awesome. So naturally, she passed. Actually scored a 92. Not like those extra 12 points make a difference, or anything . . .

While we were at the licensing office, other test candidates showed up.

The rules for the test are simple:

• Show up a little early.
• Back your car into one of the 6 test spots.
• Wait for the examiner to come bark a few orders at you and make sure you're not driving a complete piece of crap.
• Drive off with the examiner.

Our au pair backed in and waited nervously. Not as nervously as the 17 year old kid three spots over, waiting with his mom. He actually went first.

While we waited, another woman showed up. Driving a small SUV. Tried to back into the spot. Well, it wasn't actually apparent that she was attempting to get anywhere close to the test spots until I saw the back end of her vehicle coming dangerously close to the van.

I'm not talking a little crooked. I'm talking like "take up two spots - at a 45 degree angle to straight" kind of bad parking. She either had no concept of spatial relations, did not understand the mechanics/physic/geometry involved in aligning the car in a spot, or had some other degenerative muscular disorder which prevented her from having any control over her hands.

I watched her. For 15 minutes. Trying to back into a spot. After about 27 tries, 15 minutes later, she finally managed to get her vehicle in a spot. That was one over from the test spots. Not actually IN the test spot. And still slightly crooked. All under the watchful eye of the examiner.

I started to wonder if there actually was such a thing as the equivalent of a citizen's arrest in the driver testing arena. 'Cause if there were, this is how the conversation would have gone:

Mrs. Chako: "Ma'am? Can I see your testing slip?"

Incompetent: "Yes, just a moment. I think it fell off the dash in my flurry of parking activity."

Mrs. Chako: "Yeah. I noticed. Ok, Fail."

Incompetent: "But I haven't started driving yet."

Mrs. Chako: "Exactly. That would still be . . . Fail."

Incompetent: "I'd like a second opinion."

Mrs. Chako: "Ok . . . . um . . . fail."

Incompetent: "Fail?"

Mrs. Chako: "Yes. Fail. Did I not say 'fail'?"

Incompetent: "But . . . "

Mrs. Chako: "Fail. And don't park next to my van."

Scary thing is, if she fails, she's gonna keep practicing . . .

Now let me go make sure my liability insurance is updated.

Respectfully submitted,

The Wife

I Held My Breath . . .

Trying to do some work, and got distracted by a movie. Son #1 and his au pair rented the movie "Penelope". I decided to watch it myself while reading through some accounting memos.

It was a typical live-action fairy tale. Boy meets girl, circumstance keeps boy from girl, boy eventually gets girl. Pretty standard fare.

But I'm a sucker for the romantic. A sucker for "boy eventually gets girl". A sucker for that first kiss.

I wasn't disappointed. James McAvoy has that John Cusack-like quality. That little bit of scruffy helplessness. With pretty eyes.

After it all resolved, and the spell was broken, she finds him again. When he realizes it's her, and you see the realization in his eyes, I think my heart stopped.

And then it happened. I held my breath . . .

And he kissed her. The first kiss.

I was still holding my breath.

*sigh*

Respectfully submitted,

The Wife

Live Blogging Monday Night Football . . .

Well, Drizz has some suggestions for the bet. If we're going with the panty modeling - just remember it could go both ways. So I don't know if I'm brave enough to model, or if we really want to see Drizz model if he loses. Maybe headgear is the way to go . . .

FIRST HALF

• First score is for the Vikings. 3-0 (Drizz). Of course, it was made by a former Packer.
• Immediately followed by a MONSTER pass by Rogers. Favre-like, if I do say so myself.
• End zone!!!! Talk about Favre-like - Rogers threaded a few needles with that spiral. Of course, the fact that the Vikings just had like 37 defensive offsides didn't help. We tried to determine if they kept going half the distance to the goal line inside that last 3 yards, would they eventually be on the paint? Oh well, credit to my boys for taking advantage of it . . . WOOT! 7-3 (ME!)
• Vikings can't do anything with their possession. Too bad. Still 7-3 (ME!)
• Rogers looks like a total farm boy. But he's got a decent arm. And he just ran it for the first down. Nice.
• 42 yard field goal. Not a TD, but a score. 10-3 (ME!)
• Vikings can't do anything with their possession. Seems like a recurring theme. Too bad. Still 10-3 (ME!)
• Field goal attempt, Packers. BLOCKED!!! Cheese curds! Wait . . . still 10-3 (ME!)
• Halftime - gotta do some work now! Back in 15.

SECOND HALF

• Can't believe they scored. But only a field goal. 10-6. Still me!
• Can't believe we had to punt. WTF? I think "inelligible downfield" calls are kind of stupid anyway - hey, if a guy can get downfield and the play changes . . . bonus, it seems. Robbed of the TD.
• Vikings can't do anything with their possession. Recurring them. Still 10-6.
• FREAKIN' AWESOME PUNT RETURN . . . . OMG!!!! My hands hurt from clapping. And amazing I still have my voice. Packers so totally rock. 17 - 6. (ME!!!!!!)
• Viking score . . . blah, blah, blah . . .
• OMG . . . another freakin' awesome run . . . 3 yards to goal . . . Aaron Rogers goes for it . . . TD!!!! And a Lambeau Leap! Good thing the fans caught him, though . . . it was not his best effort . . . 24-12!!!!!
• We pause for a moment - Drizz, any thoughts on what you'll be wearing? Only 5 minutes to go!
• Ruh, roh. Viking TD. Gotta protect now. Tried for an onside kick, but its Packer ball at the 39. Come on boys! 24 -19 (still me . . . ) . . . hold 'em.
• Turned over. Too much time on the clock, boys. Making me nervous. I HATE purple samba panties.
• INTERCEPTION!!!! Bad Vikings . . . Great timing, Harris. Even if you have hair that little girls might envy. Packer ball! 24-19 (still me . . . ).
• Two plays left on the clock. Take a knee baby! Take it again!
• DONE! Winna, winna, chicken dinna!

Drizz, I will arrive with appropriate attire for you to wear again. Keep this up and you'll have the best collection of Packer gear for when you eventually come over from the dark side.

Respectfully submitted,

The (winning) Wife

Bring It

Monday night. First night of the season without our boy. Who I couldn't watch play this weekend.

I guess it's probably like watching your ex-husband with his new wife. Even if you still like him, and like her, it's not like you want to see it right in front of your face. But you still ask your friends about how he looked. Which, according to the Dr., he looked pretty good.

But I loved my team before there was him.

Tonight, one of my favorite rivalries, made even more favorite because I now have someone to focus my rivalry on . . .

What say, Drizz? Another friendly bet? We can pay up at the Bash . . . you looked mighty fine in that Packer t-shirt last December.

I'm open for suggestions on what the loser ought to do/say/wear/pay . . . just have them in before kick-off at 4 p.m. EDT!

Oh, and remember Drizz is a little frazzled after his weekend . . . let's go easy on him.

Respectfully submitted,

The Wife

Reflections of Summer

As Seattle winds down the last sweet days of summer sunshine, it seemed time for a little introspection and . . . reflection . . .

Respectfully submitted,

The Wife

Twitterpated . . .

Ever had this feeling?

I know someone who does . . .




Respectfully submitted,

The Wife

Coming of Age

Monumental week for us, really.

This little guy started kindergarten today. His new au pair and I walked him to his classroom today . . . he held a hand of each of us. He had his name pinned to his shirt, and his kindergarten teacher greeted him at the door. He told me he was too shy to talk to the kids, but after a kiss, a hug, and an obligatory photo with mom, he went.

I didn't cry. But I realize it's the last time I'll take a child to school for the first time.

*****

On another note, this guy also had a couple monumental firsts. He learned how to do a load of laundry today, when he realized he didn't have any jeans that he liked or that fit that were clean. He also discovered that a daily shower and a swipe of the deodorant was now a necessity, not just some far-off text book discussion of puberty.

I said "Welcome to stinking."

He stood in his bedroom, swiping his hands across his armpits, creating a breeze and said "Release my inner man-stink."

At least he has a sense of humor about it.

Remind me to keep mine when the rest of puberty (read, Victoria's secret catalogues and lotion) hits.

Respectfully submitted,

The Wife

Divert All Resources . . .

. . . to this man.

He and his family might need a refill on hugs.

I'm planning to give him a HUGE one in a month . . . but go give him an invisible one until I get there.

And don't worry - he's the kind of guy that will give it back to you when you need it too.

Share the love.

Respectfully submitted,

The Wife

More from Mt. Rainier

As if you needed an invite . . . who wants to come visit me now?

Respectfully submitted,

The Wife