Friday, August 22, 2008

Dear Mrs. Chako . . .

Do you have a burr under your saddle or something this week girl? Sheesh. You need to take a chill pill. Get yourself to the ranch or something. Nothing a nice ride won't fix. On Duke, that is. You can't have my cowboys.

Ok, so you're lookin' all snazzy in your stuff this week . . . and I admit the little red Guess pumps are a good choice for a Friday. But all that window dressing can't hide the stress ball underneath. Good thing your family loves you - I don't know if I can put up with much more of your attitude, girl. It's starting to bring me down. And that's hard to do.

Come on, let's work on relaxing. We're going to channel DK's advice . . . Breathe. That's it. Breathe.

Ok, now think about Duke . . . pretend you're riding Duke. Did you go ordering Duke around? No. You just sat, and let him take you on the ride. Lean forward going up the hill, lean backward going down the hill. Easy enough. Sit back. Take a few pictures while you're along for the ride. You didn't remind Duke every five minutes he needed to stay on the trail. Hell, you even gave him enough rein to eat some clovers . . . maybe we all need a little rein to eat some clovers, Miss Bossy.

Has anyone died because you didn't finish a memo? Didn't submit your expenses? Aren't sure if your client's cash balances? No. So pretend you're on the ranch - NO SIGNAL. Walk away from the phone. The Blackberry. The email. It will be there tomorrow. Or at least later tonight.

Ok, I know you'll feel better if you go finish those last couple things on your "to do" list, so go get it done. And you'd better scratch "Christian" off that list - I think Betty had dibs. The Dr. might not take too kindly to that item anyway.

Oh, and stop worrying about those few extra pounds . . . a little elk meat and a couple helpings of bacon and eggs on your ass never hurt anyone . . . besides, we fill out our jeans a little better with it. The boys at the ranch didn't seem to notice the extra cushion from the apple cobbler. If its really bothering you . . . then go eat a salad or two, or go take a walk. Sitting in your glass walls stressing over your Excel spreadsheet ain't helping, sister.

Hell, girl . . . channel me. I know how to relax and enjoy life . . .



Love,

Jayne

2 comments:

DrChako said...

If you're busy tonight, would you mind if I took Jayne on a date? I hear she doesn't even have a Crackberry...

-The Husband

Anonymous said...

Jayne is cool. She knows what she's talking about.