Wednesday, September 28, 2011

The Answer

It's buried in the archives, but I'm pretty sure I posted it.

"For the next 365 days, I am the answer"

It was for my 42nd birthday. Any Douglas Adams fan (or other person mildly aware of pop culture) will get the reference. The Answer to the Ultimate Question of Life, the Universe, and Everything - 42.

My 43rd birthday is only a couple months away and so many things are different than they were last year - things I couldn't even begin to imagine. I often quote W.E. Deming to my staff - "It is not necessary to change; survival is not mandatory." Didn't realize how much it could apply to me. Tonight, as another wave of change hit me, I pondered the statement I made last November (however tongue-in-cheek it may have been): "For the next 365 days, I am the answer."

Realized tonight that I am the answer. To everything. Not just for the 365 days that I existed as a 42 year old woman. For every day before, and every day to come.

When I ask myself:

  • How did I manage to accomplish these things - I am the answer.

  • Who gets credit for my successes - I am the answer.

  • How did I get lucky enough to have one thing or another - I am the answer.

  • What failed - I am the answer.

  • How do I make the best of it - I am the answer.

  • Where do I find my happiness - I am the answer.

  • Where do I find my peace - I am the answer.

Hard thing about this is . . . well, that I am the answer. Easy part is that it doesn't matter what the questions are . . . I know what the answer is. Can't fear a pop quiz when you already know the answer, right?

You still may need to remind me, now and then . . .

Respectfully submitted,

The Wife.