Thursday, March 11, 2010

Poker Conversations

So I’m playing online poker the other night to rid my brain of the day’s minutiae. I sit down in a SNG and in the chat box, one of the players has typed “Blow me.”

For some reason, I just couldn’t resist commenting. “Wow – did I just walk into the wrong room?”

The offending guy, who’s screen name was Eduardo or something equally of the macho, Rico Suave genre, types in “Do you give head?” I think I heard his pinky rink clink.

I still couldn’t resist. “Do you?”

There was a pause. I could almost hear him try to adjust his strategy.

“I got head from a hot blonde last night.”

It was like he was setting me up with softballs. No, maybe t-balls. I swung.

“Your dog doesn’t count.”

There was a prolonged pause. I thought maybe I’d silenced him. One of the other players commented. “I think you scared him.”

He wasn’t completely undeterred. “You have big tits?”

Neither was I. “Big enough.”

I managed to get a “lol” from the room.

He made his next move. “I bet you’d be fun to have sex with.”

Little does he know. “You’re probably right, E. But unfortunately, I took a vow of chastity with respect to men who felt compelled to ask me how big my tits were.”

This time the silence was more prolonged. No one else chatted. I could hear crickets chirping. Then he went on auto fold. Then he was gone altogether. Someone in the room expressed their appreciation.

I apologized for the dog comment. It was a little over the top.

Respectfully submitted,

The Wife

PS – I won.

6 comments:

KenP said...

Hot Damn! Dat make me so hot, Baby.

Sincerely,
Kenaldo

P.S. Not sure, but the auto fold might have been the parental control software kicking in.

BamBam said...

Waffles changed screen names again?

;)

BWoP said...

You.
Rock.

(Word verification: furver)

lightning36 said...

“Your dog doesn’t count.”

muhhahahahahahaha

Unknown said...

Take a bow.

Taunting people like that is my second favorite thing about online poker.

The Sister said...

Chicks totally rule.